Saturday, February 26, 2011

Growing up.

Part of growing up is, being left at home. I can’t remember what age I was at first, and I can’t call my mother as she on the other side of the world.  But I do remember this memory.  I was left at home and we had a set of rules of what to do and what not to do.

1. Don’t answer the door, unless you know who it is (this confused me too).
2. Don’t break anything (Conan the Destroyer here).
3. Clean your room (hahahaa).
4. No fighting with your brother (He started it first!)
5. No watching television. (yeah right; I never knew why she said this one?)
6. If the phone rings say I am in the bathroom/toilet (strange?)

So my mother left as she had something important to do, like grocery shopping or something of that agenda.  So here is Mr Saturn (brother) and I, doing what we do best, sitting down watching tv, fighting over the control of the remote.

RRRinng, RRRinng, RRRinng, goes the phone.

Me: “Hello”
Caller: “Hi, is your mum there?”
Me: “Umm.. she is in the toilet, can she call  you back?”
Caller: “Yeah, sure”
I hang up...Click...

Phone rings
Me: “Hello”
Caller: “Hi, it’s me again, you hung up before I said my name”
Me:: “oh”... Silence
Caller:”it’s your Cousin Jane, is she out; can I talk to her?”
Me: “no she still in there, she will call you back, bye”
Click

Phone Rings again
Me:”hello”
Cousin: “hi its me again, so is she out?”
Me: “she just went in”
Cousin: “Oh”
Me: “she will call you back, bye”.... Click.

Phone Rings again!
Me: “Hello.........”
Cousin: “can I talk to your mum”
Me: “she’s in the toilet!”
Cousin:”gosh every time I call her, she is in the toilet, ha-ha-ha”
Me: “Yeah, she is in the loo, bye”...Click

Mum arrives, and tells us off for leaving the house a mess. Whats new with that speech? So she asked if anyone called.  I said “yes, Cousin Jane, she called like 6 times.  I said you were in the toilet, like you said”. I smiled, cos I did good, right. WRONG! Mother yelled at me and said “couldn’t you tell her the truth that I was out!  She is family!” But then the phone rang...

Mother: “hello, (pause) yes, yes, yes, Cousin Jane, I have a really sore tummy, I ate something bad. ha ha ha ha.......”

So the conversation ended, and it was not that important after all. But whats the moral of the story? Thank god for Mobile/Cell phones! And because you never might know, when your kid is going to listen to you or what they will listen too.  But in my case, your mother never trusts you again and now you are forced to do errands with her because I listened to her, too well.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Idealist here.

I am consciously thinking about my surroundings, I was actually inspired by Donna Karen, in fact she was the one who actually said what I felt.  I want to help the people around me, the person next to me. They are the ones who will carry this through to the next one, like a domino affect.  

So lately I feel like I am on mission, I have not figured it out yet, but so far, I have been doing the saving the planet bit, going vegetarian, using natural products for cleaning, eating organic/free trade food (when I can afford it), buying local produce and walking (okay I don’t drive, I cheated).

What I am more concern is this, we need to develop local inspirations, local arts and local produce.  I remember a time where you could say, “oh yeah, this was made down the road, by that crazy, Blah Blah”. Those were good times and home times where you could say, “I am proud to be in this Country, even if the weather sucks”, lets face it, it is not the weathers fault. It’s our fault.  You get??

So, I am off going to make something happen at home.  You know make a better Idealist world for me and you.  Even if I cheat, just a little.
Here is a song for you.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Grandmother

I am writing a post for my grandmother.  My legend, my legacy.  Here, is this woman, living in a war zone, a real one (World War 2) and the emotional one that lived inside. But I am going to give you an introduction to her.

She was this buxom, blonde with green eyes.  She was tall for her era (50's), 5 foot 8 inches! It matched her temper and well as that wicked left field sense of humor (okay it was dark and dirty humor).  I want to look like her, with her full bodied personality, and maybe I do. Then again I am not a buxom, blonde with green eyes. Am I Wicked? Yes I am! Full bodied personality, OH HELL YEAH! I know I have that.

She once said to me, "there is no best milk, as mothers milk".  She was raised in a Convent Boarding School an orphan she was, and Mother Superior (top Nun) and she was giving them sex education about feeding babies; this is Mother Superiors Quote.  But my grandmother turned that around and made it dirty towards Mother Superior, who is meant to embodied the whole virgin aspect. So sitting at the back of class, mocking Mother Superior's teachings of "mothers milk"... Dirty I know!  But she was filthy laugh to hang out with. Most likely got whipped for it too... DAM 50's.

As she grew older, she was a bit more, well... but she could cut you down with a look and her words! Duck! Thank god she was beautiful and funny, so you could forgive her as quickly as she said it.  Thinking right now about the quote, "there is no best milk, as mothers milk". It is not about feeding the baby breast milk but, a mothers love.  Thats what her legacy is... Her love, next to her dirty jokes!

Friday, February 18, 2011

Magic Show

Okay, I like Magic Shows but I don’t attend them.  Why? Well, I had a bad experience.  

When I was 10-ish my family went to see a magic show, with my mothers friends and their children as well. It was the most exciting thing I have every heard of, going to the magic show, because I love magic and seeing it in real life was, all my Christmas's and birthdays coming true.  So, we walked into the theatre and sat in our hard to see the show seats (middle-high seats , I was short, still am), and the magician with a tall hat and his black magician regalia was in display for us to be in awe of him.  But typical me pointed out that it was a very silly idea to wear black as the back drop was black too! “How am I am suppose to see him, with that silly tiny black table as well!” Ungrateful? Yeah maybe be but, the show was at night and I was the girl that wore bright colours. Yellow and Red. Still do!! Hint, hint my name kind of gives it away.

Right now we are in intermission, “yay, playtime!” Here; us four kids, Mr Saturn (my brother) and the other to kids Dan and Lucy.  They were a few years older than us, but great fun.  Getting back to the story, we all ran down to the stage and we sat against the stage discussing about the show with the other children who were there too.

Then all of a sudden I was falling, I landed on my back I looked around and saw a dark room with stairs and poles and I just happen to be on a footpath. On my feet, I looked up, the door I fell through  was closed but, I could not talk as I was winded, so what does a 10 year old do? Jump! And trying to bang that door, but it was so far up. Eventually people found me. Under the stage, cold and frightened. And my friends pulled me out, I think, I don’t remember as I was still in a state of shock.  And I ran to where my mother and her friends were and they checked if I was okay, whilst laughing at me...

Later that night I asked how come it took them so long to realise I was gone, I mean I was sitting right next to them.  Lucy replied ”well, you were answering the question and next thing you know it, I felt a gush of wind come passed me. BANG! You were gone, I did not know where you went”.  I felt stunned. So I curiously answered,“didn’t you notice that door I was leaning on?” she went no, and they were looking all around the place, it took them the whole 15 minutes to realise that I was leaning on a trap door. Hmmm Curious.

So the announcement was made stating all children must stay seated with their parents and they locked the trapped door. So the question is, "Do I like Magic Shows yes, will I attend them, NO!"

Sunday, February 13, 2011

My Valentines Day

I am spending my Valentine’s day baking chocolate cake.  In fact I have been doing this for years, it’s my tradition. I remember the first time I baked a cake my for the man I loved, back then. For Valentine’s Day.  I need to inform you I can’t bake. I have been baking since I was a little girl and had professional bakers help me as well, yet I have failed.  Now lets get back to the real story.  

Here I am working hard, cooking the best dam meal with all the trimmings and from scratch.  So, for the last course I am making him Chocolate Fudge Brownies, but since I want it to be healthy I use very coarse wheat as flour and proceed to follow the recipe.  But I notice something strange, it’s getting heavy. Oh well, I throw it in the oven, presto it is done.  So we eat the meal I made and now it is time for the brownies... Its heavy to carry out of the oven and hard to cut. But he bites, bangs his chest, coughs wheezes out, “milk please!” And swallows.  He looks at me, choking and tries to clear his throat and it has a ton of chocolate in it as well and says. “thank you, I love it”. I go “really?”.  He gets up smiles and finishes the last bit of his square fudge brownie, banging his chest for the brownie to go down in to his stomach.

So, now we are not together, and my baking has improved slightly, just this time my cakes just crumbles and it is much lighter.  I do still bake my chocolate fudge brownies for me now, for one; on Valentine’s Day.  It does not make me sad that I am alone, I mean I have great memories.  Every time I take a bite, I smile and laugh from all the times when I nearly kill the man I used to love, when I baked for him; on Birthday’s, Anniversaries and Valentine’s Day. I guess that’s love right?

Friday, February 11, 2011

Validation

I have been searching for validation, looking for someone to give me a hint or a clue about me.  But I am not finding it.  Why? Cos, no matter what they say it is never going to be good enough. Stupid brain.  Now you are going to say, “crap, this girl is messed up!”, well yeah, sure I am. But so are you.  Name me one person that is perfect?? NONE! That’s what.  I understand this is a more serious entry, it’s just another part of me; my offerings.  I have accepted the fact that there is exposure to myself here and I thought you may as well see this side,  you know get the full spectrum.

So, after I have been asking around for blog advice from people, or should I say, I have been looking for validation from people!  None have really given me anyway.  I mean, what do I want from them?  What do I want... I want people to take notice at what I am doing or finally understand me in a broader sense.  But then I got this email, from a very old, old very old friend.  And he gave me some sort of what you call, “smack-in-the-face”, email.  Like he insults me, and then proceeds to tell me who I really am.  Shucks.

Who am I? Different! That is who I am, and because of that, I may not be able to relate to the people around me very well or them to me, but people can see that.  This is the reason why they like about me, being different. STRANGE?!?  And now, I take a shower, fix my hair, greasepaint my face on and put my best shoe forward and slap-some-silly-sense into me.  Why? Cos, I’m different. That’s what I love about me, and that's what they love about me.

What did this old friend say to me? I will tell you.

“you see the world in a way no other does, appreciate what you have and realise how lucky you are”.

So yes, I am giant ball of crazy, that's me! And I should stop doubting myself, that’s me again.  Hey, I was validated, even if he did try to insult me by saying “stop spamming your s&*t, sorry”.  Hmmm.... Luckily I know him well enough, or I was going to stab him with my wordy-words! Prick!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

My Theme?



Okay from the feed back I am getting, well there is a few.  For instance; Why? My response is why not! Or the other one is, “have a theme”.  Okay I understand that, but I thought it was obvious, I am a wanderer, looking for a home.  May be I did not make myself clear.  Then again this is my world you are entering in and sometimes I don’t make sense. I will work it out, I am still learning, watch me develop. ha-ha-ha. I am now entering puberty again, I have always wanted big boobs.

So lets get back to the theme story again.  I think the theme will soon emerge once you see more than just one or two blogs.  I will have some references on astrology and there is going to be stories of my childhood.  I like telling stories about that.  It is kinda funny.  I was a good sister but I was also mean to my little adult type sensitive brother, we will call him Mr Saturn.  You know like, sensitive, stickler when it comes to rules, making sure things were done well and followed the instructions to a tee. He is so balanced and yet so fun to hang out with. He does think he is the big man in campus, just not mine. OUCH! Love you, Mr Saturn.

Here are my experiences and what I am doing right now, they are my opinions, my offerings to you from me.  My theme is ME!